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[personal profile] tiedyedave
It's about time to post again.

There has been a lot going on in my life that I would like to talk about, but I can't field it here, since it touches on issues I don't talk about over insecure channels.

No longer entirely vegan, but only in a small way: taking fish oil gelcaps (a double whammy) for omega-3 needs, specifically DHA and EPA. I know of a Swiss company that makes this type of supplement in vegan form (using an algal oil derivative), but the supplements are less than half as strong and about six times more expensive, even before shipping.

I've been very self-centered for the past few months. I use this term almost neutrally: it's just a fact that I've had a lot of internal analysis to do, a lot of identity questions to consider. However, this has had some undesirable side effects. I've noticed myself taking up more space in conversations, being me-me-me, which is an almost necessary consequence of the way I change myself and take on new identities, but it's not something I want to make a habit of. I want to be a listener again, though it seems so very odd to say that in a livejournal.

I have begun to overcome an idea that's burdened me for essentially my entire life: that for whatever reason, I am not actually living my life yet, just setting things up so I can live it later. I blame the relentless progression of school for part of this: middle school prepared me for high school, which prepared me for college (I went to an aggressively college-prep high school), and then college was preparing me for a job or for graduate school, and now graduate school is preparing me to be a professor or researcher of some kind, which will have its own stages of preparation (tenure track or seniority). By the time I'm 'ready' in this sense, I will have readied myself to retire and then to die.

Saw Ratatouille, and it was delightful. Highly recommended.

Date: 2007-07-26 01:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nickjong.livejournal.com
Yes, I also had to disabuse myself of the notion that investing in the future is always the right call. Unfortunately, you can't live in the future.

Date: 2007-07-26 02:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jcreed.livejournal.com
Explore-exploit tradeoff, dude.

Date: 2007-07-26 03:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] omega697.livejournal.com
Yeah, except we get to stuck in explore that we totally forget about exploiting until we're almost 30 and as of yet have not really started living our lives.


Date: 2007-07-26 03:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] omega697.livejournal.com
Flax seeds!

Five Tons of Flax!

Date: 2007-07-26 03:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foolmonkey.livejournal.com
From wikipedia's Discordians article:

In the Principia Discordia, "Five tons of flax" is given as the answer to the question, "Is there an essential meaning behind POEE?" (This is a reference to a Zen story about "Three pounds of flax.") Discordians have since taken "Five tons of flax" as an absurd slogan or as a universal answer to philosophical questions. "Flaxscript" is also depicted as a genuine form of scrip, serving to avoid the use of government-issued currency.

Re: Five Tons of Flax!

Date: 2007-07-26 03:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foolmonkey.livejournal.com
Also, from the Koan article:

A monk asked Dongshan Shouchu, "What is Buddha?" Dongshan said, "Three pounds of flax".

Date: 2007-07-26 03:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foolmonkey.livejournal.com
I am ever so slightly ahead of you on the "living my life now" front. I've had that problem for years, and I'm coming out of it now, but I still have plenty of leftover issues from it.

I tell you what, failing out of grad school makes it much easier to stop waiting for my life to start.

Date: 2007-07-27 05:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yannaboo.livejournal.com
I'd sure like to overcome that myself, someday!


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